For the past 5 weeks, I’ve been sleeping on my mother’s couch and desperately holding onto my savings for dear life, with all the big changes that are about to unfold this year. But one thing I’ve managed to master in the past month: patience.
Despite my not really wanting to be back in my mom’s house and wandering around the old town I used to walk as a teenager, I’ve kept one foot in front of the other, creating creative solo projects to pass the time away and practicing meditation every day on the sandy shores of the beach. Headspace is a miracle worker, friends! I can’t recommend it enough! Definitely sign up for free and try to see how it works for you. I used the first 10 sessions for free and loved it but couldn’t manage to get the extra funds to pay for it monthly, but I received an email and got 3 months for 99 cents! I’ve been just loving it.
My life feels really stable at the moment. I often am overly stressed and worry about a lot in my day to day life.
I am fearful of living a life that I am not proud of.
of not getting enough time to do all that I hope to see and experience in this lifetime, of regret, of looking back on my life and not taking enough chances, of not following my dreams wholeheartedly.
The Beginning of my 2017
However, this past month has been a wonderful start to 2017. It’s been quiet, reflective, peaceful, and meditative.
I’ve been putting my faith in spiritually to new heights, relying on meditation and the breath to get me through each new obstacle that comes my way.
I’ve found clarity through prayer, books on spiritual enlightenment and Buddhism, and long walks along the ocean. And with all this centered-ness comes my redirection on the wishes I hope 2017 will bring me.
Here are my hopes for 2017
Travel
With Bali and China this February, Iceland in August and more travels throughout the year, I’m excited to explore continents I’ve never explored before! Asia is a continent I will be able to check off my list!
Taking Risks and Choosing Bravery
This includes my family + children portrait business I wish to start this Spring in Virginia, as well as only taking day jobs I love and that make me unconditionally happy. No more day jobs I’m not satisfied in! I want a day job I love waking up and going to everyday. Something intellectually stimulating. Something that teaches me skills. Something that makes a positive impact around me. No more shitty day jobs. Take the risk!
Give Unconditional Love to My Partner
This year is a big milestone for Alex and me. This coming March, Alex and I are moving in together.
Big step, guys. I’m a tad nervous, not because of Alex or my trust and certainty of our relationship, but I’ve never lived with a partner before. Being 22 years old, I’ve dated plenty during my 5 years in New York and had a few casual boyfriends, but this is my first-ever serious long-term relationship.
Moving in together is a really big deal to me. I always told myself I wouldn’t move in with someone before dating them seriously for 4-6 years. But after 2 years, I’m certain about Alex. WHATCANYADO! Love does crazy things to people. I’m beyond excited and I can’t wait to be reunited back with my other half in NYC, pack up all our things and soar off to an unknown city to start our lives.
I am so unbelievably excited for our future together. I see so many wonderful things happening for us, and I am beyond ready to take this step. I can’t imagine anything better than living with your best friend AND your lover – and all in one person! With living together comes, practicing even more patience, acceptance and giving unconditional love no matter what comes up. I am prepared to give so much love.
Take More Photographs
On April 6th, 2016, I got my first DSLR camera and took my first series of portraits. After learning the basics, reading the manual, learning the basics Photoshop and Lightroom, I now want to shift my photo skills up a notch, specifically crystal clarity in my images, colorful editing (sunsets, perfecting light), and getting more creative with composition.
Write
I say it every year. “I will write more! I will blog more!” And I do write. All the time. Letters, postcards, scrapbooks, journals, blogs. But this year I want to create something of serious substance. A book of essays? A novel?
I’m going to start visualizing and putting the time in consistently. Also, I need to stop starting and deleting blogs. This year in 2017 I created two blogs: Helena Woods Travels and MyGypsyLight. I wasn’t satisfied with the branding, message, theme with these previous blogs so I deleted them but I will commit this year to this one.
One blog, one idea, one domain.
A new beginning.
Kick Away My Bad Habits
Raising my voice when I’m angry, getting overly anxious and having panic attacks in high energy moments ( remember to BREATHE….), telling myself I’m not talented enough, telling myself I’m lost or aimless (the more you tell yourself something, the more it becomes true), going crazy over my bank statements, I will work on these nasty habits.
Quit Worrying
Don’t worry….every little thing is gonna be alright. Everything that is, IS. What will happen WILL happen.
It is not bad nor good. It just is.
Note it, acknowledge the thought, then let it go and go back to the breath.
That’s all you can do.
Here’s to a peaceful and prosperous 2017.
xx Helena
